Everyone can use a little makeover {personal}

A few months back Taylor was home from school sick. It was another rainy, wet and cold day, that I spent strapped to my computer, and almost obsessively checking and re-checking my Facebook -page.

I am a fan of one of the local parenting magazines, and happened to notice an online makeover contest they were offering. Taylor walked by as I voiced the fact that I need a makeover and would love to win that. I also want to be on the show "What NOT to wear" and we jokingly say we need to enter my Mom as well.

Before....not so bad.

Everyone woman in her "rut" of normal life could use a good pick-me-up at one time or another, but I never have had much luck and winning is usually not something I do very often. Taylor asked me to forward the notice to her...I had a slight inkling she was up to something and I thought it was cute for her efforts. Never once did I think I really would win. I actually had forgotten very quickly about the whole thing.

Here is a copy of the letter written by my girl. Unedited in all it's glory, she was sweet to be sure to mention that I DON"T feel pretty and could totally use on of these....

My name is Taylor Alderin, I am entering this contest for my mom because my mom means so much to me and she spends so much time taking care of me and my little sister and making sure we are happy or that we are in good schools getting good grades. I think you should pick my mom for this contest because she is a great person and she never feels like she is beautiful on the outside my mom does feel pretty on the inside but her raising 2 kids on her own has been getting very hard for our family and i feel like if you were to choose her to get the makeover then maybe she would be more confident in raising me and my sister she never has time for herself.

another great reason is that she works very hard but she never has the money to buy new clothes for her or new makeup so she is always unhappy with how she looks but if she were to get this she would look in the mirror and say"wow today i look beautiful" and that would make me smile every time she says it.

the last reason you should pick my mom is because its so hard for me and my sister to every morning have to tell my mom over and over again that she looks great and she never believes us so i think if you guys would give her this chance to be happy for along time then our family might run a little smoother.

A few weeks later, I was in appointments, being asked to try on outfits that were slightly "out of my comfort zone" and meeting some amazing women who just wanted to spoil us. Leah, the other winner and I became instant friends. We cried together, laughed, and drank mimosa's in the hotel bathroom together.

There are so many wonderful sponsors, who without, the experience would not have been manageable. One of the many reasons I love Bend, all the support in our community.

I spend so much time with work and the kids, taking care of other people, I forget what it's like to be pampered. I had a great time, and am so blessed to have been able to participate. Day one of the makeover was hard. I loved the manicure, and I had great visions of video taping the trying on of clothes like you see in all the movies...trying on hats, and crazy outfits and in the end making a funny, entertaining movie. This isn't exactly how that day went down.

I have to remind you...this was AWESOME! As I tell the next part, remember that....I had SO much fun. I was nervous, and excited. Kaci and I met Leah and our stylist Astacia down at one of the consignment shops in town, a funky store in the Old Mill. There had been outfits in my size pulled out for me to try on, with accessories to accompany the pretty new clothes. A huge pile of clothes lines the dressing room walls, and for a control freak like myself, I was pleasantly surprised at the selection. I know my body, I know what looks good on me and I know how hard it is to find pants long enough for my 5'10" frame.

I watch all those makeover shows on TV and always roll my eyes as they all cry about their clothes or the cutting of the hair. It's just clothes people...hair grows back. What I didn't expect is that in actuality when you loose all control over such simple things, there is bound to be some kind of emotion. The same is true for me. I didn't' expect to get so emotional, and I think I hid it well, but I am not too proud to admit I broke down. I had my moment of weakness in the dressing room, among the piles and piles of clothes, dresses, pants, shirts, all too small, too short, and too tight. The "not working" pile was now larger than the almost non-existent "kinda working pile. Before I knew it I was knee deep in tears and the fun movie montage of our experience was not happening.

When I think I had tried on everything possible outfit and separate in my size, it was time to move on to the next store. Frustrated and feeling overwhelmed by the possibility that this photo shoot would be much less than perfect, I ventured to the next store with our stylist. Leah came along for support, she of course being nothing over 5 feet and absolutely adorable, had found her first outfit to work out for her. Everyone was patient with me, and while I'm sure I hid things perfectly, I doubt most of them even noticed :)

The second shop was a find for me. The whole time my perfect fitting outfit awaited me on the hangers of this particular store. It fit like a glove and soon enough the smile was back on my face and I anxiously awaited the hair portion of my makeover. As I am constantly changing my hair, this is one area that did not scare me. Until I found out that I didn't get a say in cut, color, or ANYTHING!

I was in good hands, and in the end realized that hair grows back...in the end, I wish that weren't the case. I love the cut and want it to stay forever!

The rest is a blur, mimosas in the bathroom, flashes going on off in every direction and I have to admit, I felt like royalty. While I still feel absolutely gigantic next to the tiny little 5 foot nothing Leah, I'm pleased with the pictures. This is another area difficult for me. I'm used to being behind the camera, making decisions on lighting, posing, and anything else that comes along. I don't like being photographed, and as much as I try to convince all of the gorgeous women I photograph, that EVERYONE is beautiful ( I do truly believe this) There is something that happens in my head where I, Tambi Lane, am the exception to this rule.

What I did learn that day, is I'm loved. I had a great friend of mine Kimberly Teichrow taking the pictures, she of course wants me to look my best and will do her job to make sure I do. To not be able to throw out "the bad one's" was hard, to let someone else choose my photo was excruciatingly painful. But in the end...I look great.

I don't' regret a minute of the experience. Not even the part in the dressing room where I wanted to crawl out the back door and straight to the gym in hopes that 10 minutes on the treadmill would take care of those few extra pounds I've been stashing away.

Everyone wants to feel like a princess and we should all have our five minutes of fame. I got to have mine documented on video and in print for the people of Bend to stare at for the next two months. Thank you so much to everyone who made this possible. In the end, I actually did feel pretty on the inside...and out.

Thanks to my girl, for loving me and wanting me to be happy. I guess maybe I am doing something right with her.

getting my color done.

One of the MANY "afters"

And the final product that will be in various locations ALL over town....

What would the world do with out sisters...{personal}

When I was young I always wanted sisters. I was the only girl in my family of three children, and as many teen girls anyways feel, NO ONE UNDERSTOOD ME!

I wished I had someone to tell secrets too, someone to get fashion advice from, or someone to tell me all the secrets I needed to know to have a "normal" youth, when it came to boys. This unfortunately is something I was not blessed with.

At my next stage of life I wished for girls, baby girls, two in fact. They were going to be best friends who got along ridiculously well, tell each other everything and look as sweet as ever in their matching outfits.

What on earth was I thinking...I did get the two girls, but best friends is not what I have. They are complete opposites. Both unique and fun in their own ways. Through what used to be the source of constant heart break for me, something at one point in my life, I wasn't sure I would actually live through, I inherited two "other" girls.

Taylors father graced with world with a "few" children. Taylor being the oldest, she also has two younger sisters, and now a brother, from her father.

In the beginning, it was hard. There were two other girls with his same eyes, and in your face similarities to my baby. I could look into their tiny faces as see more of "him" in them then I could see in my own daughter. (Now this is a blessing, I will admit, that she resembles me more than him)

I will tell you that it was a tough year. What I came to realize is that these same tiny faces, that resembled "him" didn't ask to be here, they didn't ask to be put in the middle of a mess, and what's "normal" these days anyway?

So, my oldest daughter now has three sisters, two of which don't live with us, and a brother she's never met, but technically, these three children are as much a part of her as Kaci, and should not be treated any less.

We are not perfect about the visits, but try often to see them. They are two of the sweetest kids you'll meet, and they both absolutely, undoubtedly love their sister.

I received a call a few weeks ago from Breyanna, the older of the two. She's six, missing most of her teeth, and in the sweetest heartbreaking voice says this...

"Um, Tambi....I miss my sister, and I have the calendar in front of me with a few dates picked out. I'm wandering if you can find time to come see me in the next month or two?"

What kind of a S*&%$ would I be if I didn't pick the soonest date, rearrange a few plans and go see these two??

We spent a little over 24 hours with the girls, and while it doesn't seem like a lot, it was a jam packed 24 hours. Breyanna asked for something for when she misses her sister. What better than a video, where those far away seem closer than they are, and at times if you close you eyes real tight, it might even feel like they are right there. That a hug can happen at any minute and you can literally hear that giggly little laugh.

Video

So, after 5 years of loving two little beings, and having those tiny little things crawl up on my lap and snuggle themselves to sleep, all of the hurt just melts away. It doesn't matter anymore that I didn't end up with the "normal" family I thought I needed. All that matters is letting a bunch of silly, energetic, crazy girls; some with the same feet, or the same color eyes, or the same silly laughs be sisters, no matter what. To love each other and know that it's OK.

My hope is that one day, when they are older and close, despite the distance that they grew up from each other, that the secrets will be told, the fashion advice will be given and that Taylor will feel some connection to her other half. While it's a joy to be a part of their lives, and let them into ours, 24 hours is sometimes enough for me to remember that possibly I'm out of practice. More than possibly, I AM out of practice. The car seats and multiple trips to the bathroom, the constant hunger and naps that need to happen. I'm used to my flighty lifestyle where I can, at the drop of a hat, do what I want, when I want, where I want, and how I want.

But for 24 hours, or maybe a week, we'll give all of that up for a big ol' Breyanna/ Zoe hug!

Little Miss Popluarity {portraits}

Ever since Kaci got her hair died you'd think he had become a star. There was a rush of girls the flew into her homeroom class Monday morning to see what all the fuss was about, and accusations like "Your only playing with her now cause she has cool hair" My little fashion-ista almost started a riot in the halls with her perfectly quaff hair and bright shade of red.

I don't think she knew what to do with all of the attention, as she is not your typical attention hog. She leaves that duty to her unbelievably, in your face, theatrical sister. I told her to enjoy it and just remember who your friends are. She needed the boost...lately she's had a rough time.

Kaci doesn't make friends easily. She's a tom boy, but now at an age that if you play with a boy you must want to marry him. The girls either think she's weird, for her "unique" fashion trends, or she doesn't want to hang out with them for the drama and the constant chatter about "who likes who"

I love it that at 10 she has her head on straight and possibly we won't have the same issues as with Taylor. Taylor's whole life revolves around who she wants to date, who wants to date her, or who her friends like. It's exhausting.

In second grade a new family moved into the school. This school is unlike others in that you had to get in on lottery and hardly EVER does one of the "golden spots" open up in any grade other than kindergarten. Once your in, your in, and families rarely leave.

The family had a boy and girl, both in my kids classes. Every year there seems to be one particular child that your child has tough time with. Well, unfortunately for Kaci this family, or rather, this families sweet girl was it for her. I always tell her to give people a chance, they might surprise you when you get to know them. As I mentioned before...she's a stubborn child and this was not what she wanted to hear.

Over the next few years Kaci and Vanessa stayed away form each other. The small complaints, of " I just think she doesn't like me" or "She's a girly-girl Mom" started to become fewer and I started to notice that they two girls were finding some similarities this past year.

Both avid crafters, they worked on several projects together and Kaci started to discover that Vanessa was either not the girly-girl she had previously thought, or maybe V was just coming into her own. Whatever is what....they have found each other.

Kaci came home from school the other day, talking about Vanessa. They've spent allot of time together over the last few months with trips to the library after school and had one play date last week.

Now, what I'm about to tell you has to be kept in complete secrecy. but it's just too cute not to share. Kaci says she has a new best friend! Her and Vanessa talked and discovered neither of them has ever had a best friend, so, I think it was Vanessa, asked if they could be best friends. They have allot in common, crafting, an older sibling, silly, sweet, creative, being raised by single mothers, etc.

I had the pleasure of spending the entire day with them yesterday. It was so fun for me to see her connect with another person that way. They tease each other and no one gets hurt, they are both sarcastic at the right times, and their fashion statements are very similar. I hope that Kaci and Vanessa find themselves to be long time friends, they'll be good for each other. Plus I like her mom, so that's a benefit.

After Kaci came to the realization that unlike a few of the other girls in her class, that Vanessa actually played with her pre- makeover, the two girls wanted to do a "friend" photo shoot together. They had the best time yesterday picking out crazy outfits and getting ready. Vanessa loved it. She's a ham for the camera, and was so gracious to me for doing it. She kept saying how much fun she had, and I love to hear that in a 10 year old!

Her's a few from the day...look at these two, they are just too cute!

Vanessa's hair pieces are "fake" but she sure does look good...Kerry???

Love, Love, Love this one! Look at that face!

I love this one too....

Ps...the glasses, well those are fake too. But they wanted to match...isn't that cute!

Amy Wenzel + I Heart Faces= Awesome Opportinites

Every year around new years I think of things that I want to change. Things I want to do different..you know...the typical "new years resolutions" This year was no different. I did not choose the gym, I chose, for me, a more attainable, less frustrating approach.

1) Wear earrings. The dangle-y kind.

I have 5 holes in my ears, I wear small, unnoticeable hoops everyday. They are silver, they go with everything. I never take them out, and most days I forget they are there.

2) Enter everything.

I've never been one to win much. I think mostly I have bad luck, although now this seems to be changing. I figure the odds have to change if I enter everything that inspires me.

This brings us to my post. I have found yet another contest. This time it is for a seat at a workshop, by an amazing photographer Amy Wenzel, and I Heart Faces. Most of these contests out there, or scholarship opportunities want us to dig deep and tell our story. So this is what I must do. Tell my story. Some of you may have heard it, some may think you know it, but this is it, in 600 words or less, this is how I found my passion, and why I love to do what I know I am meant to do.

It was 2002; I was a mother of two small girls. I closed the door on one chapter of my life, wandering what would happen in the weeks to come. I finally made the choice to leave a bad marriage and start a life for my girls.

In high school, I took a photography class. My teacher thought I had "potential" and encouraged me any way he could. I loved being in the darkroom, loosing myself in my photos.

I moved back to Oregon, after my divorce, I had stayed home for many years. At 27, I literally had no skills. My mother knew a photographer who said he'd meet with me. I scrambled to put anything that looked good into some kind of presentation and met with him at his studio.

I'm sure he met with me to humor my mother, but was pleased with what he saw, especially knowing that other than a High School class, I was becoming a self taught photographer.

Over the years I have worked along side many talented and encouraging photographers. I read books, and learned what I could. I ventured the daunting task of studio lighting, with help of a great friend, and decided one day...I WILL be a photographer.

On the advice of a local woman, I made business cards and put a website together. Work was slow, in the beginning and many days I was discouraged thinking this "dream" of mine would never become reality. How many single mothers, barely making it, working full time one day just decide they WILL be a photographer and actually have that happen?

I had to change my thinking. This was not the attitude of a professional, and I was determined to make this happen.

The decision to go full time professional was forced. I was laid off from my job, and the market was scarce.

The strange part is, the whole time; I know someone/thing has been watching out for us. There has not been one day that we aren't blessed by our opportunities.

I have a long way to go, but being able to provide for my family, doing what I love, and in turn blessing other people with meaningful images, has been the best the thing that has happened to us.

I am able to live the life I dreamed of, and only hope that through the years I can continue to do so.

Recently, I stumbled upon Boudoir photography, which has been amazing to watch what has happened through my lens. I've seen women find themselves again, remember they are beautiful, and watch women that never really thought they had any greatness, find it in an hour session. In the beginning of my Boudoir adventure, I was foolish to think I was actually the one making the difference. . What happened, is that these women have actually helped me. They took this self-conscious girl, the one that still thinks of herself as the quiet girl that no one notices, and let me show the world why I'm here. As I strive to convince all of these women they are beautiful, they actually are teaching me.

Everyone I am able to photograph changes me bits at a time. I see myself in them, I realize they are me. We teach each other that feminine beauty is more than skin deep, and everyone has something to give. No matter what size, shape, color, or marital status, each woman is unique, yet we always find a common denominator. We all need to be reminded why we are here...

I love seeing how photography has changed my life, and that of my girls, as well as all of the special families I come in contact with. I know I am blessed, lucky if you will, and I want to continue to live out my dream. I enjoy seeing the world with different eyes now, and instead of wishing I had done things different, I now know I did them just the way they were meant to be. Congratulations to whom ever this opportunity goes to, may you find your passion if you have not already done so, and continue to bless your selves and those around you with your perception of the world.

March Newsletter

I have posted the March newsletter.

Click here to view

Miss Kaci....Rockstar

Kaci is a stubborn child. She doesn't like to do much, unless highly motivated, by candy, money or hair die.

We've been having some major problems getting her motivated to get dressed, put on clothes, you know...all the necessities of getting one's self ready for a day of school. There is alot of wandering around the house, looking for a shirt to literally jump out at her, or magically turn into something.

I finally found the magic potion. Who would have thought letting your ten year old color her hair would make life so much easier.

My mom never would have let me do such a crazy thing at 10, but this mom...well, I love it that she has personality and if Ronald McDonald red is what she wants, then by all means....

I took Kaci down last night to get a cut and a few colored pieces in. She looks so cute! I was more than pleased with the way it looks. I must say I was a bit hesitant on the bangs, but this girl can rock it! She loves the hair and has even promised to keep it combed...WOW!

I had to celebrate such a joyous day, the day Miss Kaci, my tomboy, my skater chick, my non-dress wearing kid, wanted to put on a bright red skirt and totally rock the new hair!

Some teachers are actually angels in disguise....{portrait}

When I was in fourth grade I had the most amazing teacher. Miss Hildebrandt. (I think that's how you spell it) I remember she was beautiful and kind and when things were falling apart on the playground, she was always there to make us feel better. Of all of my early childhood education, this is the teacher that sticks out in my mind. I think of her fondly even today and when my children were young, I dreamed they would find their own "Miss Hildebrandt"

It was about a year after we had moved to Bend. Life was rough, and the girls, especially Taylor, were suffering from all of the drama that centered around her father. Her first day at yet another new school, she was not all to thrilled.

Taylor's special "Miss H" came in the package of "Bettina". A tiny and vibrant little thing, with silver hair and a personality that makes you love her the moment you lay eyes on her. I instantly fell in love with this woman, and rightfully so. She has the most beautiful spirit I have ever seen in another human. She's modest and honestly does not do it for the glory. She completely and honestly loves each of her students individually.

That year especially I thank God for bringing Bettina in our lives. She made changes in Taylor that i never thought I would see. She brought out the wild personality, and sparkle in her eyes that the prior years had robbed her of.

Everyone at our small little school knows Bettina, she is somewhat of an Icon in the Amity halls. Not that all the other teachers go unloved, in fact they are the best group of educational professionals I have ever met. There is just something special about this one.

Taylor was lucky enough to have Bettina one more year before her journey of Elementary school ended. This time, it's Kaci's turn.

I'm so happy for her that she gets to experience a year of school with such a great woman. It will changer her...she's just a bit more stubborn than Taylor and taking a little longer to see the fruit.

This is a woman, by most that meet her, that will be remembered for years to come. One that they will look upon fondly for knowing her, and make these same people better for just having walked the same halls as her.

If you think I'm putting too much pressure on this amazing lady, just ask the hundreds of other mothers in school, and the thousands before us....I am confident they will say the same thing.

Bettina is one of those teachers that honestly does it, not for the glory, or the paycheck, but simply to make a difference. I feel honored to have met her, and have our family be a part of hers.

All of that to say, I had the pleasure of photographing Bettina last week for a photo contest. It's a seniors, over 50, photo contest. I sat in a room with Bettina and another school Mom who happened to be there. We all just had a conversation. We talked about the kids a little, we enjoyed a few laughs, and I just watched. I watched what happened when you got her talking about her kids. These are not the kids she gave birth to, but the hundreds of kids that walk through her door and touch her life each year. They are the same kids she remembers fondly for years to come, and the kids that she loves with everything she has.

Whether I win or not, It was a pleasure to spend time with her, and just be in her presence. She has a spirit that speaks louder than any other I know. We enjoyed a glass on wine together, and all the while she is talking, she is lighting up that whole room. If nothing else, I am honored to be able to give her something...everyone deserves to have a photo of themselves. One that reaches in a captures their soul, their inner person, their true self. It's a rare moment in time when the walls come down, and people relax enough to get exactly who they are....and this lady my friends, is one of the most beautiful women I have ever met.

This one I think is my favorite. It's beautiful and quiet. It's all about the eyes here.

This is a big Bettina laugh. You can hear it ringing down the halls and guaranteed, you will start to laugh too....it's contagious.

This is the one I call her kid face. This is just the way she looks at all of her kids. It's the look they get when you know she's interested in what they are saying...even if it's about the loose tooth they had three months ago.

I think I just saw Marilyn Monroe! {Boudoir}

When I say Hollywood Glam, Marilyn Monroe is who comes to mind. She embodies Glam to me, and I love the old fashioned era and beauty! Had I been able to find an old fashioned cigarette holder I would have been beyond ecstatic last weekend at my Hollywood Glam shoot.

I rented a room at the FABULOUS new Oxford Hotel. The very second I saw the interior of this place I knew it just had to be photographed with gorgeous women draped all over the yummy comforters and sleek 40's inspired furnishings.

I had another AMAZING group of women, I know I say that allot, but seriously....I get the best clients! 4 ladies set appointments to be photographed, a few stragglers just to see the hotel and my usual group of friends showed up to help out once again.

When you show up to a Boudoir event you are certain you will have a good time, this area we are not lacking in. You'll find a drink in your hands at all times, thanks to your own personal assistant for the evening....the one and only, Chantelle. We have Bambi with hair and makeup, and as usual, she did an outstanding job with all of the ladies. Some of which even set appointments for hair cuts later that night. This girl is great, so if you happen to be in the market for a new stylist, go check her out over at Plethora. Sophie is my lighting guru. She says she doesn't do anything, but the combination of the two of us is magic and somehow the room is always cleaned up by the time the camera goes away. This time I even had dinner handed to me, hot soup and a super yummy salad before I could even throw myself into a chair to relax. It's crazy to me how that happens when Sophie doesn't "do anything".

The night was relaxed and easy, and I'm pretty sure everyone involved had a ton of fun. I got some gorgeous photos...these ladies always know how to work it, even the ones who say they don't know what they are doing.

I of course had to stay the night, you know...since the room was paid for and all. The beds were squishy and comfy. The shower was spacious and warm and even the shampoo was wonderful. Had I been able to wander up to use the sauna and hot tub, the evening would have been perfect. I could have done with out the buzz saw in the bed next to me. ( The kids met me around 12am for a sleep over, and Taylor snores like a old man) The morning was easy and we were all sad to say good-bye. I could totally get used to that lifestyle.

Thanks to the entire staff at The Oxford, from the front desk ladies who walked numerous guests to the elevator and never cussed me out. (at least that I know of...) Every time they called to announce one of them, they always did it with a smile in their voice. I'm sure after #5 THAT got annoying. Thanks to our wonderful concierge's, Jason and James, for getting all of our gear and luggage safely to our room, even though we took up TWO carts, they were happy to do it...both ways! Finally, thanks to Mr. Ben Perle for the tour and allowing all of us rowdy ladies take over the hotel...or at least floor #3. We had a blast, and hope to do it again.

So without further ado....the ladies of the evening.....

What's Your Sexy?" { Hollywood Glam } from Tambi Alderin on Vimeo.

LOVE, love , love this next one!!!!







There are many, many more fabulous, sexy, and way to HOT of photos to post to this blog.....